RIP

last week I burry my girl friend. It was a sad morment but I feel free now. All the tention has gone. nomore will i suffer, she is gone now. its a wonderfull feeling to be free from attachments

New life

my life on edge

live is a berdon

life is a berdon I could not bare it anymore this is a mess and I am mesed up. even god has abandon me it seems death waithing sometimes it is not plesent.

Jest want to hang

have nothing to do just want to hang but do not find the strenght for it. I have to die. if you ever have any love for me you will give me iteranal peace. but evern the god has abandon me. want to hang that is all nothing feels good. everything is a mistake.

Why?

Please god why dont you end this and let me rest in peace. the berden you put on me is so heavy. and I am tired of this. end this and let me sleep. give me iternal peace and take the berden from me if can.

Thankyou god

thank you god for ending I waithed this for whole my life I begin to pray when I was 14 years old and still does seems you have forgoten me does end that hard. all I want is to leave everything behind and move to what ever lies ahead. death is feard by people who have a life but a puppet like me. it is the ultimet freedome I could get.

This is useless

it is useless to write to someone who do not listen I have no way of knowing this goes to her or not. if I could read minds and if I know what will happend there would be total diffrent out come I would have been married years ago and I would have childerns doing A/L but I have no way to know and I only guss and with out risponse I cant tell what is what. I try to explain but could not find out any thing. and no body understand try to suiside but did not work now I have no hope but to wait till the end even if it kills me.